It happened yesterday, and I can't stop thinking about it.
I put Elijah in his high chair and threw some raisins on so I could get the older kids something to drink before Jacob needed to eat again.... and then I looked. Elijah was smiling ear to ear and was trying to grab my hand.
Have I even said hello to him today?
Did I kiss or hug him, or give him any attention that would let him know that my love for him hasn't changed?
I've NEVER struggled with the "will-I-love-this-child-as-much-as-the-others" question while pregnant... I always knew there was enough love to go around. The problem is, at this point I don't have a lot of TIME for each child, and it worries me that in their eyes TIME=LOVE.
I am so grateful that they are surrounded by people who love their guts and can make up for the time I am unable to give and I know that my kids will always feel loved. I guess it's back to making the little moments count.... like diaper changes and bedtime readings... times where I can catch each child's eye to let them know that although time is tight, my love for them keeps growing.